Delicious Nothings

Yeah, It's Kind of Like That

Thu, 28 Aug 2008 18:10:37 -0400

Lately I’ve been suffering from, what I like to call, “Brain Block.” There’s so much going on right now and so much to think about that I walk around feeling like my heads in a cloud. I can see faint outlines of the things I’m supposed to be thinking about…but I just can’t quite reach the though. So I feel like I’m not really thinking about anything. Though I know that my sub-conscious is churning away at the block and one day, hopefully soon, the dam will burst and the cloud will lift and I’ll have figured some things out. That’s way this blog has been kind of dormant for the last week or so.

However, until then, I’d like to showcase some of my daily reads. For today, may I suggest, “My Life in a Cube.” A daily graphical blog about office life in a cube. Not only is it hilarious, but it hits close to home to anyone who’s had to experience office life of any kind. Check it out!

WEEZL

Sat, 23 Aug 2008 15:44:00 -0400

Yep, that’s right. Another edition of vanity plate goodness. Today’s sighting, as if you hadn’t guessed from the title, “WEEZL.”

Now I’m a bit confused by this…is this a nickname? Does the person fancy themselves a weasel? Is this a last name (I sure as heck hope not)? At least with this one I can pretty much guess as to the proper pronunciation. Though with my luck, it’s probably something like “Weez L.” …excuse me, I think I just threw up a bit in my mouth.

All in all, though, this one’s not too bad. It’s not pretentious, not over the top…it’s more like the car equivalent of “Hi my name is ‘Weezl’.” And that’s something I can get behind.

So yesterday I blogged a bit about my Windows Vista experience. ...

Fri, 22 Aug 2008 10:10:00 -0400

So yesterday I blogged a bit about my Windows Vista experience. And then lo’ and behold, this morning what’s sitting in my inbox? An email entitled, “Exploring Windows: What do people really think of Windows Vista?” Creepy. It’s like Microsoft has this giant machine that listens for any mention of the word “Windows” or “Vista” and then immediately contacts that person with PR materials. Insidious I tell you! Or, the slightly less paranoid version, someone from Microsoft read this and decided to send me some materials. If that’s the case, “Hiya Microsoft guy or gal!” Or the most logical reason, coincidence. Yeah, I know, not quite as fun as a giant microsoft machine.

A OS By Any Other Name

Thu, 21 Aug 2008 18:52:25 -0400

There’s been a lot of talk about Windows Vista lately. With the realtive failure, PR wise, of Microsoft’s Mojave Experiment and the general level of supposed consumer dissatisfaction, Windows Vista isn’t having a very good run.

Until recently, I’ve been running Windows XP in Bootcamp/VMWare Fusion on my MacBook. I’ve had no issues and have been enjoying the freedom that running OS X/Windows has given me. My only real issue is that by utilizing my bootcamp partition in VMWare, I can’t use the instant on/suspend feature. Instead I have to wait for XP to do a full start up/shut down anytime I want to use the OS. Since I only really fire XP up to view a movie or some other file that I can’t read on my Mac, I decided it was time for a change.

I’ve been curious about Vista for a while, so I thought I’d give it a shot. I bopped down to the store, picked up a copy and decided to install it in it’s own virtual machine sans-Bootcamp. Installation went smoothly and within an hour I was up and running. I’ve only had Vista installed for a few days, but I have to say, I’m very pleased. I haven’t had any real issues and am loving the UI enhancements that Vista brings to the table. I don’t get any of the fancy Aero functionality, as it’s unavaible while using VMWare, which is a bummer. But it still looks much more polished than XP.

So at this point, I can say that I think Vista is a victim of it’s own hype machine. I do believe that it was plagued with problems at launch. However, it’s been over a year and with the introduction of SP1 I believe that Microsoft has squashed many of the useability bugs that were present. Maybe things will change, but as of right now, I’m liking it. Wow…can’t believe I just said I like a Microsoft product. Oh what’s that? Hell froze over yesterday. Oh ok. Then I guess I can say that.

VANI T PL8TES Tuesday Edition

Wed, 20 Aug 2008 16:17:18 -0400

So before I get into the latest vanity plate, I’d like to point out that I am an idiot. In a comment from yesterday’s post, it was pointed out to me that it probably reads ,”I pet sit”, and is probably an advertisement for an enterprising, pet-sitting individual. Thus goes the fickle nature of the vanity plate.

On to today’s plate. I was driving to work today and was presented with this gem of a plate, “B GRRRL.” So what’s up with this one? Am I supposed to infer that the driver is a girl? Thank you captain obvious. Is the plate owner a girly-girl and wants the world to know? Is she really fond of bees? Is she a girly-girl, bee lover? The world wants to know.

VANI T PL8TES

Tue, 19 Aug 2008 18:03:32 -0400

Let’s get something out in the open right away, “I hate vanity plates!” I do really hate them with a passion. Nothing says “egotistical narcissist” like a vanity plate. Yeah, yeah, some people will say that vanity plates are a method for self expression. However, I’m willing to bet those same people have their own vanity plates that say something like “iluvme.” Fine, fine, I’ll admit, there’s a part of me that’s always wanted a vanity plate…just like there’s a part of you that’s always wanted one. But that’s also the part of me that I regularly punch in the face for being an collosal prat.

With all that being said, I’m going to try and blog about the various vanity plates I see in my day to day travels. And now without further ado:

Yesterday, while driving down the highway I was cut off by this gem of a plate

“IPETSIT”

I pets it. Pets what? So is this person like Elmyra on Tiny Toons who “loves ‘em and squeezes ‘em” till death do they part? Or is this pets it, like, well…you know? Either way, this vanity plate gets a big steaming plate of fail from me.

Customer Service Woes

Thu, 14 Aug 2008 14:40:50 -0400

DTE (the energy company) hung up on me today. Seriously!? After I spent 10 minutes in your annoying phone menus you’re just going to hang up on me? No wonder people are crabby when they finally get to talk to a CSR. Sigh. I hate the hassle of moving.

Vittles + Squirrles = Crazy Delicious (or is that Red Vines + Mr. Pibb)?

Wed, 13 Aug 2008 16:31:00 -0400

So my friend prompted me to sign-up for the Twenty Something Bloggers network on Ning. I checked out their home page and it definitely seemed like a cool place. I proceeded to click on the “sign up” link…

Like most social networks, I was presented with what appeared to be a general profile form. It asked questions like “Tell us about you” and “What is your name.” I was kind of tired at the time so I tried to answer as much as I could and as completely as I could, but I figured I’d revisit the info and beef it up in a day or two after some much needed rest. As you can imagine, towards the bottom of the form I really just wanted to move on and begin exploring the network. As a result, I was giving less and less thought to my answers. Then, I was presented with the last question. It was something like “People who love [blank] will love your blog.” I thought to myself…”Sheesh. I’m not sure. I’ve never really given any thought to what the underlying themes to this blog are.” So like any self-respecting person would do, I put in the most random thing I could think of…again thinking I’d come back in a day or two and change it. So now “People who love delicious vittles and squirrels will love my blog.” Great. Moving on. Submit.

What I didn’t realize, was that what I not just a profile…but an acutal sign up form/application that was going to be read by real people. Whoops. Wish I’d had known that before I spoke of vittles and squirrels. Ah well…maybe it’ll give the people that read that form a laugh. Today’s lesson: Reading the details of a form before you fill it out is a good thing.

This Post = Awesome

Tue, 12 Aug 2008 10:35:00 -0400

I was running on the treadmill the other day at the gym. Somebody had put CNN on the TV. Not my personal choice to work out to, but it’ll do.

As I’m running I’m reading the ticker on the bottom of the screen. Here’s what I see that day:

Depressing news about the war
Depressing news about the economy
Depressing news about healthcare
CNN = Money
Depressing news about the state of education

Wait…a sec…back up the train folks. CNN = Money?!?! Ok, I admit, I don’t watch CNN all that often. But really? There’s now way this can be a normal thing. Either somebody was having fun on ticker duty that day or CNN has some big brass balls to make such an audacious claim. Either way…I thought it was pretty hilarious and made my run just a little more enjoyable.

The Cheese Sandwich Affair

Tue, 05 Aug 2008 13:23:37 -0400

SOM: ::Scraggly old man totters into the coffee shop and heads to the bathroom.::
CSE: ::Coffee shop employee knocks on the bathroom door::
SOM: I'm busy.
CSE: ::Walks away::
SOM: ::Totters up to counter::
SOM: You, know. Whenever I come in here and I'm in the bathroom it's always pound pound pound. Well I'm sick of it. I've spent a lot of money here. I always buy the cheese sandwiches. I'm just sick of it. Grumble grumble...cheese sandwiches. ::totters out::
CSE: Um, we don't sell cheese sandwiches.

We Salute You, Mr. Talks on the Cell Phone in the Bathroom Man

Tue, 05 Aug 2008 13:03:00 -0400

“Oh Hi. Welcome. Why don’t you take a seat. No, no. I’m good. You? That’s great. I suppose you’re wondering why I asked you here. Well…we need to talk. No, nothing serious…well at least not life-threatening. But, well, you have a problem and I wanted to talk to you before it got worse. Basically, well, …STOP TALKING ON THE CELL PHONE IN THE FREAKIN’ BATHROOM!”

Ok, I’m serious, when did it become socially acceptable to talk on the phone while in the bathroom? I get it, cell phones are useful and by design, portable. But really, is something so important that you have to take the conversation into the bathroom? No, I really can’t think of something so important that it can’t wait until you’ve done your thing and exited the restroom.

Now let’s examine the MANY things that are wrong with cell phones in the restroom:

1) Bathrooms echo. Did you realize this? This means that every single word you say is heard by everyone else, in stereo.

2) I don’t really care what you and your girlfriend are doing tonight or that you’ve closed that business deal. Really. It’s your business. Not mine. I don’t want to hear it.

3) Did I mention that bathrooms echo?

4) Other people USE your phone. Yep, I’m guessing somebody else at some point uses your phone. Would you give them your used toilet paper? Nope, didn’t think so. Don’t give them you nasty bathroom phone.

5) And I’m looking out for you here, Mr. Uses the cell phone in the restroom while talking loudly man, the likelihood of you dropping your cell phone in the toilet increases exponentially if you’re using it. Really. You could lose it…or have to fish it out of the toilet…which may be a fate worse than death.

So please, do the world a favor and end the conversation before you enter. Don’t worry, you can call them back when you’re done. I’m sure they’ll wait.

Oh, and I’m warning you now, if I’m in the bathroom and I hear you on the phone, I will make EVERY effort to flush the toilet every 10 seconds or so so as to alert the person you’re talking to that you don’t respect them enough to keep the conversation out of the restroom!

“What’s that…you see the error of your ways and will never do that again. Great! I’m so glad we’ve had this talk.”

Sleep 5-7-5

Wed, 30 Jul 2008 00:35:15 -0400

So tired right now.

Oh look, I am cranky too.

Sleep is still far off.

The Free Drink Carrot

Tue, 22 Jul 2008 14:08:11 -0400

Ok, so I’m ready to admit it. I have a fat wallet. There, I’ve said it. The elephant’s out of the room.

It’s true though. I’ve always had a fat wallet. In fact, I carry it in my front pocket because it’s like sitting on a huge rock if it’s in my back pocket. And I don’t know about you, but I’m not a fan of sitting on rocks. Just a personal preference.

Every so often, I go through my wallet and try to thin it out. And every single time, I struggle when I get to my frequency cards. You know, those little punch cards that everybody and their brother hands out. I’ve got one for each of the six different coffee shops I visit plus a few other random ones. They’re all in varying states of completeness: some are tantalizing close to a free drink, others are 10 more purchases away.

So here’s the problem….I can’t figure out which ones to get rid of. I have to keep the one to the place I visit most often and I can get rid of the couple from the places I don’t frequent often. That makes sense. Right? Well yeah, except the law of the universe will dictate that I don’t visit my favorite place for the next three weeks and I’ll end going to the place I haven’t been to in a year multiple times next week. Arghh. So in the end, they all go back into my wallet and the fat wallet returns.

How about you? Are you tempted by the free drink carrot at the end of a full punch card?

Wasting Time Is Not Actually Wasting Time

Mon, 21 Jul 2008 18:56:46 -0400

So, my fantastic landlord decided it was a good idea to show my place at 7:00pm tonight. Really!? I know you need to show people, but…seriously?! And today of all day’s I’m all kinds of crazy tired. So all I want to do is go home, sit on my couch, and fall asleep. Sigh. So I got out of work at 5:00…now what do I do with myself?

Well, here I am, 2 hours later. And what have I learned:

1) You can only go to Best Buy so many times in a week before it no longer holds any sort of enjoyment. Cap it at 2 times a week. Max. I’m warning you.

2) Kohls has AWESOME bathrooms. I’m serious. Kohls has some of the nicest public bathrooms I’ve been privy to use outside of fancy schmancy restuarants.

3) The back of a bookstore in the mall is a nice quite place to escape the screaming children and overall craziness of the mall.

4) The mall’s not that interesting when you don’t have any intention of spending money…mainly becuase you don’t have any.

5) Auntie Aune’s Pretzels are crazy delicious.

So there you go. Now…t-minus 30 minutes until my butt makes contact with my couch.

Argghh!! Design Block!

Sun, 20 Jul 2008 15:17:37 -0400

Talk about frustrating. I’ve been working on trying to come up with a design for a web page all weekend and I’m coming up with absolutely bupkis. Seriously…talk about your major case of design block.

It’s frustrating because I have this image in my head of what I want it to look like…meaning I’ll know it when I see it. Unfortunately, that image in my head is all fuzzy and I can’t seem to bring it into focus.

And now I don’t know what I should do. Do I quit and just let it swim around in my head for a while? Do I keep pounding away at it until I can figure it out?

Grr…maybe more coffee will help. Yes coffee…mmm…sweet delicious coffee.

"Fate Is Given To You; However, You Create Your Own Destiny."

Fri, 18 Jul 2008 16:31:00 -0400

“Fate Is Given To You; However, You Create Your Own Destiny.”

- Fortune Cookie

Long Time No See

Thu, 17 Jul 2008 19:02:07 -0400

Hey Blog!

Long time no see. I know, I know. Please dont’ be cross. I told you I’d be away for a while. Wait…what’s that? You were bored and all your friends stopped coming by because there was nothing new to read?! Egads. That’s no good.

Ok, how’s about I make it up to you by promising to post at least once a day for a week. How’s that? Is that a smile I see? I knew you’d like that. Ok, then it’s a deal.

Now that we’re friends again, let’s go get some ice cream. It’s flippin’ hot outside.

View from the cottage of Lake Michigan. Current mood: extremely...

Sat, 05 Jul 2008 15:14:04 -0400

View from the cottage of Lake Michigan.

Current mood: extremely content

"Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his..."

Sat, 05 Jul 2008 14:46:22 -0400

“Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own.”

- “The Alchemist” - Paul Coelho

Life's Work / Work Life

Fri, 04 Jul 2008 16:37:36 -0400

Here I am: sitting on a huge porch with a nice breeze overlooking gorgeous Lake Michigan. AND it’s the 4th of July. I should be relaxing and completely enjoying the scene. But I can’t. I have some freelance work to do and I’m behind and I feel like I should be working on that.

Since when in America did it become unacceptable to enjoy a vacation or put work on hold so as to enjoy once in a lifetime experiences and vacations? I don’t know. Maybe it’s always been this way. Maybe now, as I move further into adulthood this is a life lesson that I must learn. Either way, I need to make a choice. Do I bow to the pressure and sit here on this proch and half-heartedly do work all the while wishing I could just go swimming in the lake? Or do I enjoy my vacation knowing that the work will be there when I get back and I’ll just have to push myself a little harder to get it done?

Good question. However, today…today I’m choosing vacation. There’s a lot to enjoy in life and you never know when it’s going to come around again. I’m heading to the beach. I hope you’ll do the same. The work can wait. I’ll see you on Monday.